Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Can't Sleep...Clowns Will Eat Me

Riddle me this, Batman: why is Carrot Top so cringe-inducingly, hypnotically creepy? It's not just that he looks like a damn alien. It's not just the bad plastic surgery, or the weird 'roidy thing he's got going on right now (I'm not bothering to post photos or link to evidence in this post because Broc is having a hard time processing my longer posts these days, and I DON'T WANT TO LOSE HER) or the rickydickydonkulous way he styles his hair...It's all of those things; but his creepiness is more than the sum of his parts. He's like a ... I don't know. But he is terrifying.

Happy Halloween, chirren.

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zach said...

It's the eyebrows.

There should be a law against over-plucked eyebrows, be you little old lady who draws them back on, overzealous manscaper, or... red-headed demon spawn.

Adams said...

The eyebrows are definitely part of it. But man, seriously -- have you seen Carrot Top lately? He looks like a very mean, very crazy lady truck driver.

Electric Mayhem said...

I saw him at Barneys once in the beauty section (yeah, sit on that for a while) looking like he'd just come from the gym: tank top, wet hair (NOT poofy), sport shorts, tennis shoes, disturbing. He's the grown up Chucky.

Anonymous said...

AAAAIGH! Eyeballs...bleeding...visual cortex...ruptured...must! look! away!

It's getting so I'm afraid to check your site, Adams, what with the off-key singing and the bad eighties lingerie and the glaven.

I find thinking before I click your link...IS IT SAFE? IS IT SAFE?

Adams said...

"I saw him at Barneys once in the beauty section (yeah, sit on that for a while)..."

I don't want to sit on that for any length of time. I want that mess far, far away from me.