Sunday, December 04, 2005

Got To Getcha

Hey, y'all. I know it's been a minute since we spoke, but you know I got stuff going on, right? Serious stuff. Important stuff. Christmas stuff. Here's the deal, kids: mama is broke as a joke for another year, and while I feel less anxious and self-recriminatory about it this year than I have in years past, I nevertheless worry about how I will show the people in my life that I care about them. Now, I do not have a husband or children to buy for, and that's a relief. But Doug is expecting something -- I mean, in addition to my sweet a$$ -- and I don't want to disappoint.

Actually, now that I think about it, I'm not entirely sure that Doug is expecting something. That cat is so simple and sweet...he's probably just hoping for another year where he gets to touch boobies. Jeez. That fool makes me smile.

Anyway, I'm going to Powell's to try to score him a nice Indian food cookbook. He's insane about learning how to cook Indian food, so he'll trip off that. For Julie, I'm getting..HA! I'm not telling, 'cause I know that heffa reads this blog. I have ZERO idea what I'm getting Fergus and Paul, which is worrying. I love them both so much, and I would love to get them something that says "I'm your sophisticated, stylish, no-well-vodka straight lady friend! Enjoy this [insert awesome gift idea here]!" And they would unwrap the artfully decorated box and gasp in astonishment and then laugh and say "That saucy bitch!" and all would be well in this rather cliche world. I'm getting my parents some framed photos of Portland in the fall that I took and still need to have made into, got no clue what to get my brother and his girlfriend, either. Have I mentioned yet how much I like Gracie, my brother's girlfriend? She is perfect for him. They are the cutest couple I have ever seen. I want to smack those two kids just to rough up their pretty asses!

Anyway, I turn 31 this year -- in exactly 3 weeks, in fact -- and I'm hoping for a successful end to this dissertation drama and the money to buy myself some glasses. That's pretty much it. So if you can help me out with either of those things, get in touch, a'ight?


Anonymous said...

I'm sure that you're wondering what to get me as well, so I've made this list to make things a little easier:

- Evel Knievel Stunt Cycle
- The Best of Benny Hill on DVD
- Get the Edge by Anthony Robbins CD
- argyle socks

And if you have any inspiration or self-esteem laying
around, I'd take some of that too.



Anonymous said...


I like your blog, and I lke you. I like you so much that I wont start my own blog, which might cause all other blog readers to suspend their reading of whatever blogs that they may currently be reading, and focus their complete attenton on my blog! That and the fact that I suck at spelng and gramr. I can't wait to see you. Love your secret admirererrer. T

zach said...

I'm not sure I can assist with the dissertation drama, but maybe on the glasses front we can work something out. And all I want for Christmas is a little direction in life (which was supposed to materialize when I hit 31, darn it all). Or a new job that pays me to travel. Or a wrench set. Not that you asked. Hmmph.